One of the biggest myths about cosleeping is that it ruins a couple’s sex life. This is completely untrue! Cosleeping parents are quite capable of having a great sex life. Bedsharing and cosleeping babies don’t have to sleep with their parents at all times. They can spend the occasional few hours or evening in another room. Moreover, the bedroom isn’t the only place in the house where a couple can have sex. With a little creativity, you can have great sex whether your cosleeping kids are six weeks, six months, or six years old.

Some parents are comfortable, when their children are still babies, having sex with their little ones in the room sleeping. Babies who are in a bedside bassinet or nearby crib are unlikely to see anything. Unless you have a light sleeper, your baby probably won’t hear anything either. Even if they do, it’s unlikely that they will understand or care what is going on. If you are bedsharing, you may be comfortable having sex with your baby in bed with you–if you are lucky enough to have a large enough family bed. You don’t have to tell them, when they grow up, “We had sex with you in the same room while you were sleeping!” In fact, it’s probably best that you not! You should discontinue the practice when you feel your child is too old; opinions about that vary parent to parent.

Happily Sharing the Bed!

You can move your baby if you want some privacy in your bed or your room. It will be okay for your bedsharing babe to lay on a soft blanket on the floor, in a hamper or Moses basket, or in a bedside sleeper for a while. Your cosleeping baby will also be fine in another room in a crib, bassinet, or playpen. Just be sure that you can hear his cries. When your children are a bit older, you may have a toddler bed for them that you can place them in when you want some privacy. My son sometimes falls asleep downstairs on the sofa, and we just leave him be for a bit if we want some time to express our love alone.

Remember that there are places besides the bed and the bedroom where it is possible to have sex. You can retreat to the bathroom for a private shower, which is always refreshing and satisfying. If you have a spare bedroom, you can Christen the bed. This can be especially interesting if it is a smaller bed; see how acrobatic you can be without falling off! There’s the boring but classic couch in the living room and quite possibly the fold-out bed or futon if you’ve got one. Don’t forget the potential of the dining room table, kitchen counter, and hallway wall. If you have a privacy fence and are capable of being quiet, you can lay down a blanket and make love in the moonlight.

When the kids are old enough, you can arrange for them to go to a sitter so that you can have the house to yourself for a while. There’s also the possibility of slumber parties and sleepovers; just be sure to return the favor. You can also have a sitter come to your home while you head off to a hotel. That makes for a great change of scenery. You don’t have to stay the whole night, just a few hours. You could even have the sitter watch them at home for a minute, then bring them to the hotel after you have some grown-up time, so that they too can enjoy the free HBO and swimming pool. You can have a date night and quickie family vacation two-for-one.

The evenings aren’t the only time for romance. If your baby falls asleep downstairs, you can sneak upstairs for some action. Have a quickie in the bedroom while your toddler naps on the couch. Once your kids are older, there will probably be times during the day that they play outside or at a friends’ house. Take advantage of the opportunity, just be sure that someone is supervising the kids. If they are in activities like junior sports or scouts, have a fellow parent that you trust take them to the meeting that day, and return the favor.

Children don’t cosleep forever. Some will transition to their own bed and room after two years, and some will stay in the family bed until age five or older. No matter what your sleeping arrangements are or how long you cosleep, you can continue to have a great sex life. Just put in a little effort, and use your imagination. There’s no reason why cosleeping has to interfere with your relationship and its intimacy!

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Valentine’s Day is designed to remind you to share some tender time with the one you love- even if your ideal bonding includes handcuffs. While the sex act itself can be awesome, we all just really yearn to feel admired and loved. Dote on your partner before the sex and watch the steam rise when the consummation nears.

Valentine’s will be here before you know it! Here are various ideas to get your imagination rolling so you can start preparing for the big day (or weekend) before you’re living in the doghouse!

For the Almighty Aphrodite:

Ladies, would you like to do something special to entice your lover? Try relaxing. Women are very emotional lovers. They tend to have a hard time getting the days chores out of their mind and they spend too much time putting themselves down. With so many burdens clogging the female mind, sometimes you have to do something for yourself before you can get fully involved in the euphoria of intimacy with a partner.

Think: “Sexuality Before Sensuality”.

Spend some time pampering.

• 

  Shunga Bath Crystal

  item 10260

  A hot bath with the aromatherapy of the Shunga Bath Crystals will get rid of the stresses of the day while it exfoliates the skin and leaves you soft as silk and touchable. These Dead Sea Salts contain Ph balancing amino acids and are safe to use for even the most sensitive lady parts.

• Create a hidden surprise for him by using the Coochy to shave the pubic area into eye catching shapes (or go bare) while keeping you bump free.

Another common vice of the modern day woman is that she will often compare herself to the cover girls and feel a little under par. Stop worrying if he can see those stretch marks (you’ve earned them) or if he thinks your hips are too big. Most times, you are wasting the moment on these thoughts while he’s staring at or feeling the body part(s) on you he loves most. Being confident can be very liberating and sexy!

• 

  Garter Belt

  item L1948

  Try a piece of lingerie that compliments your body. Guys love the eye candy. Maybe you got to the gym to fulfill that New Year’s resolution- maybe not. It doesn’t matter.You are beautiful and it’s a divine feeling to show off in a well chosen outfit that accentuates his favorite body part on you.

• Completely delve into the mood with a few strategically placed drops of Pure Instinct pheromones perfume. Increase your adrenaline and sexual desire then get close to him. When the essence tickles his senses, he’ll be standing at attention.

For the Valentine’s Valentino:

Men tend to be turned on very quickly through visual stimuli but guys, looking at a porn star or watching a XXX movie may not always be the trick to turn her on. Don Quixote and Rudolph Valentino always won the hearts of their women with poetry and romance!

• Show your lover that you care and use a little thought to impress her- she will notice.  Flowers, chocolates and diamonds are always reliable, especially in a new relationship, but if you’ve used the old stand-bys before, it’s time to become innovative.

• 

  Rose Petal Seductions

  item 9150

  While she’s showering, trail the Rose Petal Seductions to guide her to the love nest. Each petal has a word on it so be creative with your arrangement.

• Prepare the lovemaking room or area by adding ambiance with the Caress Me Candles. Keep one easily accessible since these natural candles serve a double purpose as warm massage oil when lit.

• Bring a book to read. No, not Tom Sawyer, but something a little more erotic, like Jenna Jameson’s “Lip Service”. Pick a favorite story out ahead of time. When she finds you, begin reading aloud softly and watch the twinkle in her eye shine bright.

When you have her all melted, be sure to take your time and savor every inch of her body, skin, her hair and her scents. Tell her what you love about her. Ravage her and she’ll most likely return the favor.

For Both the Lovebirds:

An unexpected note is always welcome and you can do this anytime, but try it for Valentine’s this year. Get our Naughty Notes, Lips sticky note pad. Write a reason why you love that person on each note. Mix them up with personality traits and physical attributes.

• 

  Naughty Notes

  item 7337

  Put the PG-rated notes on the bathroom mirror, the fridge and the door.

• Tuck the X-rated compliments in lunches, brief cases, on a pillow or in the underwear drawer.

• Strategically place different notes on your body and present them to your mate- one note at a time or arranged as lingerie.

Other versions consist of detailing your favorite shared experiences on each page, writing down your favorite fantasy that you’d like to share or a short poem about how your lover
makes you feel.

Want to make new memories instead?

Pick a game that includes a deck of suggestion cards like the Wildly Sexy Dares Game or A Hot Affair with your Partner. On separate occasions, each of you goes through the deck and pulls out a few of your favorites. On Valentine’s, sit with each other and discuss why these ideas got your attention then each of you choose one card from the other’s choices to act out that night.

You can also hide your picks in areas you know only your lover will find them. It gives them the opportunity to build up fervor while fantasizing and you’ll have hot  nights of new adventures!

Don’t leave out the kissing!

• Rub a little Nipple Nibblers on those lips and ease into  teasing, tingling, tasty and soft lip locks that create carnal desires. Take your time and the pleasure will wash over you.

• Try the Sealed with a Kiss Game to explore the depths of this titillating form of touch.

Tips for eternal passion:

The best Valentine’s days are created by honoring and cherishing each other all year long! Every day, find a way to say “I love you”, bid each other a goodday, genuinely listen to the events of each partner’s day, hug each other, get in a tush tap or a soft caress whenever you can, and ALWAYS kiss each other good night.

All the fun playthings mentioned are availabe at my store, and we guarantee Valentine’s Day Delivery as long as you order by February 4th! Have a great Valentine’s!

If this post hit the spot, take a look at these:

• Hot Affair: Need a break? Take a drive.
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• Hot Affair: Rituals. Traditions.

Thanks to Jen Hasseler, another For Your Pleasure Romance Specialist, here are a few tricks to looking better naked without having to hit the gym.

Below are fourteen tips for looking sizzling in your birthday suit.

Look better naked tip #1

Vibrating Mesh Sponge

item 12350, $20

Exfoliate, exfoliate, exfoliate: especially in the wintertime, skin tends to be dry and flaky, so it’s important to scrub off dead skin cells in order to look radiant in the buff.

Look better naked tip #2

Body Shimmer

item 1217, $10

If you are self-conscious about your curves, tanning is a great way to look thinner without actually having to diet. For a chiseled face, sweep bronzer across the apples of your cheeks, or for Bar Rafaeli-like legs, use a darker bronzer on the outside of the leg and blend with a lighter shade on the inside. A tan can also hide other imperfections like spider veins and stretch marks.

Look better naked tip #3

Makeup may make you feel sexier; however, you don’t want it to smear all over your sheets. Instead of using a heavy foundation or cream, opt for an oil-free tinted moisturizer to even out your skin tone. It blends easily into the skin, can be used all over your body, and contains tiny light reflecting prisms to give you a dewy, sensuous look.

Look better naked tip #4

Make-up artists swear by Preparation H to camouflage any bruises.

Look better naked tip #5

Another reason to nix the white sheets: colored sheets can give you the appearance of a warmer skin tone, even without a tan.

Look better naked tip #6

Pure Instinct

item 8900, $19

Looking sweet is irrelevant if you don’t also smell great. Draw attention to your décolletage and wrists by dabbing on something yummy.  If you’re a Pure Instinct user, you know how powerful this product is!  If you haven’t tried it before, it’s a MUST TRY.  You’ll drive your partner wild.

Look better naked tip #7

Try not to wash your hair if possible. Styling is easier to do on day-old hair and tousled, wavy hair can be sexy.

Look better naked tip #8

And don’t forget to groom the hair down there! Accessorize your bikini line with crystals or have it waxed into a playful shape. Or, for those who prefer to go au natural, just a quick trim with scissors can make all the difference.

Look better naked tip #9

Looking good naked isn’t just about your body; a soft lighting scheme can help flatter your figure. Avoid harsh fluorescents whenever possible and instead try to incorporate mood lighting, such as candles or floor lamps.

Look better naked tip #10

You will also want to make sure the temperature in the room isn’t too hot or cold before ditching your clothes. Too warm will have you sweating whereas icy temps will leave you shivering and your skin goose-pimply and your nipples prematurely erect.

Look better naked tip #11

Don’t underestimate the power of a simple mani/pedi.

Look better naked tip #12

Eat lightly before stripping down to the nude. (Otherwise you will risk looking like you’re pregnant with a food baby.)

Look better naked tip #13

Body Stocking

item L1619, $20

Just because you are naked, doesn’t mean you can’t accessorize. High heels are sexy and have the advantage of making your legs look especially lean. Or, for a more playful option, don a Body stocking, feather boa or a rocking piece of jewelry.

Look better naked tip #14

Lastly, don’t forget to enjoy yourself. Remember, if you feel sexy and fabulous, you will look it, even in the buff.

Don’t forget to purchase your favorite items for once things start getting steamy!

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The Hot Affair Experiment.

A while back we started the Hot Affair experiment. About trying one relatively small task at a time, to get the thrill back. You can pick and choose as they come along, or you can try each one and see if you get where you’re looking to go. One rule: No Pressure! There are no shoulda, woulda, coulda’s in this experiment.

Just joining us and want to start at the beginning?

#1 Pampering Yourself

#2 Swallowing the Snark

#3 Rituals. Traditions.

#4 How much work does a relationship need?

#5 Be a Tease. In a good way.

Has it been one of those days? or even one of those months?

Life has been running you around and you haven’t had time to breathe, let alone take a love break with your honey.

Well, take a drive…. a sex drive at home.

Pick a time in the next three days that you and your lover will be together.

Sexual Energy Shot

item 9878

Serve some cocktails or beer, and pour a little sex energy drink into each of your last sips. This drink is a blend of plant extracts which will get your juices flowing and your libido soaring.  Just what you need to get the party started!

Tasty Twist

item 11040

After you’ve gotten your partner’s attention, add to the fun with some Tasty Twist in all the right places. This tasty oral-gasm enhancer will tickle more than just your taste buds! Choose from Chocolate Mint, Buttercream Icing or Orange Creme, apply to your nipples and your clitoris then invite your partner to lick off. Add some to his penis and let him feel the tingle from his head to his toes.

Dessert never tasted, nor felt, quite so yummy.

One Touch Butterfly

item 7825

If you want a little buzz with the fun, you’ll need the One Touch Butterfly—a powerful waterproof wireless bullet encased in a beautiful butterfly sleeve.  Tickle yourself and your partner in so many ways!

After a night like this, you’ll be ready to take on whatever life has to throw at you!

For a night of fun, buy these and more here

If this post hit the spot, take a look at these:

• My Libido, His Libido…
• A Valentine’s Day full of Eroticism
• How to choose the right Sex Toy #1:Why Do I Want a Toy?

Mmmm!

Be clear on one thing: a back rub, while divine, is NOT a sensual massage. A back rub is powerful, short and effective at ridding your body of tension, aches and pains.

Sensual massage is long, languorous and erotic, and involves a great deal of nudity and intimate touching. You give your mom a back rub. You give your lover a sensual massage.

If you’ve never given one of these wonderfully erotic massages, never fear. Our simple, step-by-step instructions will leave you feeling and acting like an experienced sensual masseuse or masseur.

You’ll Need

The Mood

Make sure you have the following items on hand:

• Candles and/or incense

• Romantic CDs

• Clean towels

• Clean flat sheet

• Massage Oil – See Below In-Depth Information

Before You Begin

Before you start rubbing your honey, take a moment to set the mood:

• Lock the door and turn off your cell phone. You want quiet.

• Prepare your massage surface, whether it’s a professional massage table or a bed.

• Provide rolled towels for a neck and knee rest.

• Since massage oils stain most fabrics, spread an old (but clean!) flat sheet over your massage surface.

• Illuminate the room with sensual lighting. Turn off glaring overhead lights and drape sheer fabric over floor lamps. Light candles.

• Make sure the room smells good: use scented candles, incense or room freshener.

• Keep cool water nearby for quick hydration.

• Put a couple of CDs into the changer so you don’t have to stop and put on a new CD.

• Both of you should take a shower, shave and trim your nails.

Communication

Connect

Talk to your partner about your upcoming experience. Make sure he or she understands the difference between traditional and sensual massage — if she’s expecting the former, an erotic massage might be quite unwelcome!

Connect

Start by connecting with your partner. This will vary from couple to couple, so follow your instincts. You might kiss his or her face, lightly touch his or her body, or gaze into each other’s eyes. When you both feel connected, invite your partner to lie face down on the massage table or bed, and arrange pillows and towels to his or her liking.

Sensual Massage

Start slow

Begin by lightly stroking your partner’s body with the tips of your fingers. Start with the back, and then move to the shoulders, arms, buttocks, thighs and calves. Remember to use only light, teasing strokes. When you sense that your partner is relaxed (you might have to ask), you are ready to progress to massage.

Pour about two tablespoons of massage oil into the palm of your hand, and rub your hands together lightly. When the oil is warm and evenly distributed, begin massaging your partner’s back with long, deep strokes.

At the beginning, communicate frequently with your partner to determine if the strokes are too hard or too soft. Keep your hands in contact with your partner at all times, take your time with each rhythmic-yet-sensitive stroke, and proceed from long, gliding strokes to shorter, deeper strokes.

Use your body weight rather than your arm strength for deep strokes; during gliding strokes, keep your knees slightly bent and fluid, and don’t lean over the table.

Once you have developed a rhythm that pleases both of you, move on to the shoulders and arms, and progress to the legs and feet, brushing the buttocks as you move up and down your partner’s body.

Ask your partner to turn over. Begin massaging the chest, arms and hands. Pay special attention to your female partner’s breasts: don’t be too invasive at this stage, but don’t ignore them. Lightly stroke the nipples and undersides.

Glide down to the legs, brushing the genitals on your way down. After finishing the fronts of the legs and feet, glide back up and slowly brush over the genitals. Tease your partner by brushing his or her inner thighs near the genitals, and very lightly touching the pubic region.

Allow the erotic energy to build until it seems like a natural time to start shifting the focus to more explicitly sexual activities.

Genital Massage

Look into your partner’s eyes as you begin touching his or her genitals. Make sure the rapport you built at the beginning of the massage still exists; if it does not, try to reestablish it by slowing down and asking your partner a few questions about what he or she is experiencing. As you proceed with genital massage, remember to use your free hand to tease the rest of your partner’s body.

Female Genital Massage

Start by gently rubbing the entire vulva, follow with clitoral stimulation, and finish with internal and clitoral stimulation — don’t forget the G-Spot! Remember that vaginal penetration usually doesn’t feel good unless she is already in a fairly high state of arousal. If your partner is comfortable, feel free to use a vibrator to assist you in the massage.

Male Genital Massage

Begin by applying some lubricant to the palm of your hands and rubbing it gently into the penis and testicles. Male genital massage is guided by one main principle: slow down and stop or change what you are doing just before ejaculation becomes inevitable. Ask your partner to let you know if he is about to ejaculate, or develop a signal – verbal cues, raising a hand, pulling away slightly, or even subtle body language cues can all work well. It’s usually best to vary strokes at the beginning, and then concentrate on one or two kinds of strokes as the massage nears completion. By bringing your lover to the peak without allowing him to ejaculate, you prolong the massage and help your lover have a more intense orgasm.

Hold Each Other

Happy

After the massaging is finished and you are both relaxed, remember to spend some time together before falling asleep or running out the door. You have both just shared an extremely intimate experience. Hold each other, talk to each other, and enjoy the intimacy as long as you can. Be positive about the experience, especially if it was your first time. Remember, practice makes perfect!

Massage doesn’t just feel good — it can actually improve your sex life. Sensual massage relaxes you and increases the flow of blood within your body, making it easier for you to become aroused.

Massage is a wonderful way to relieve stress, promote healing of your body and mind and recover from injury or chronic pain. In addition to promoting good health and relaxation, massage can help you grow closer to a loved one. You may want to try receiving a massage with an intimate partner. While some spas and massage therapy practices will allow mixed genders to receive massage at the same time, in the same room, others may ask that you meet up afterward. Some practitioners will perform massage services outdoors, in a private location, which can be an especially romantic way to experience massage with a partner.

Whether you’ve received massages before or are totally new to the experience, you’ll want to find out about the different types of massage available today. Keep your mind open to new things, and you may find massage to be the solution to your problems — physical, emotional or romantic!

If this post hit the spot, take a look at these:

• What Should I Massage with?
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The Hot Affair Experiment.

A while back we started the Hot Affair experiment. About trying one relatively small task at a time, to get the thrill back. You can pick and choose as they come along, or you can try each one and see if you get where you’re looking to go. One rule: No Pressure! There are no shoulda, woulda, coulda’s in this experiment.

Just joining us and want to start at the beginning?

#1 Pampering Yourself

#2 Swallowing the Snark

#3 Rituals. Traditions.

#4 How much work does a relationship need?

Enjoy a little sensual flirting with your partner!

Plan a nice dinner out with your sweetheart.

You’ll be feeling and looking beautiful because you’ll be wearing Pure Instinct, Sugar Lips Tingle Gloss, and SHHH! – your little secret is that underneath your clothes, you’re wearing the beautiful Butterfly Thong.

After you’ve ordered your dinner, excuse yourself

Sugar Lips Gloss

item 6372

Tell your partner you’re off to the restroom quick before the food arrives.  Before you leave the table, though, give him a long, lingering kiss with your Sugar Lips Gloss on your lips.  As you walk away, his lips will tingle from your gloss, and your kiss will linger on his lips even longer.

Once you’re in the bathroom

Butterfly Thong

item L2046

Remove your Butterfly Thong and put it in your purse.  When you return to the table, hand the thong to your partner underneath the table.  You’ll drive him absolutely wild and your evening is almost guaranteed to end in some steamy romance!

Enjoy!

Look here if you want to purchase any of the products I have suggested or to browse all the others we sell.

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